Rejuvenate Your Vocabulary!

2018, the Era of Political Correctness... Wouldn't that be wonderful?

Instead, it's the era of "Political correctness gone mad!!", according to the people failing in hordes to conduct themselves in a manner deemed 'politically correct'.

"I'm entitled to my own opinion!", "freedom of speech!" are common comebacks when individuals are called out for their non-PC behaviour & while both points stand true & valid, having personal beliefs or ideals does not exonerate a person from the law & when what they have to say is an attack on the freedom of others it can & often does become a hate-crime.

"I use some words with my friends, but I'd never say them to someone's face so I'm not hateful. It's just a laugh."

Regularly using words with friends normalises them & over time can even change their meaning entirely. For example, the word 'mongo'/'mongloid/'mongol' is a derogatory term originally used against people with Downs' Syndrome but over time has become applicable to any form of idiocy or stupidity. In Scottish culture it's not unheard of to endearingly refer to your friend or yourself as a "wee mongo". When we use a word so often for things that it's not generally used for, our brains can sometimes forget the original connotations & disassociate entirely from its true meaning, leading us to misrepresent ourselves when we accidentally use a 'bad word' in front of the wrong audience.

This leads us to the question: Should we be using any words that are considered 'bad' for certain people? The answer is no.

"I call my best friend 'my nigga', but I'd never say it to a black person."

I once had a conversation with my nana, she was about 87 at the time.

During a story she was telling of a black family moving in to the house across the road, the word 'darkie' was used. Seeing my horrified expression, she stopped speaking to assure me that she would never even dream of letting them hear her refer to them as such. I asked her why them being aware she used that word for them would cause issues, & I immediately felt my own anxiety and unease shift & rest on to her. The conclusion was that she knew this was a derogatory term, a form of oppression, BULLYING nonetheless... Yet removing the word from her vocabulary altogether seemed to be a big ask. My nana is not a hateful person, nor does she have any disdain towards black people (I'm sure this is why she doesn't want them to think she's racist for using a racist word).

Mentioning my nana's age is relevant because the saying/justification 'it's a product of their time' is a valid argument to an extent. Having lived through a time where black people were heavily oppressed & slurs were common, 'darkie' became a normalised adjective as it would have been used & heard openly in social circles. This is why we have a generation of older men casually using homophobic slurs like 'faggot' or 'poof' to describe anything they don't consider masculine enough; it was the go-to insult of their time - a time where gay people faced oppression - & in situations of frustration or conflict it's still ingrained in their memory. The issue with this, while they may not be 'hateful' (just ignorant), is that the language is then passed down to newer generations &/or anyone else exposed to it. Every year, language adapts and new phrases are coined. "That's so gay!" should not be synonymous with something being broken, damaged or not good enough, yet in primary school classrooms teaching children as young as 10 years old, it's exactly that. Freedom of speech is vital to society - but so is eliminating hate directed towards each other & that can be done by slowly but surely changing the way we speak & the terms we use. It's 2018, not 1950 - so much has changed, there's no reason our vocabularies can't get updated for the better.

There is a massive privilege issue when it comes to desensitisation; many people guilty of using slurs don't intend them to be taken as such, but when an offended individual makes themselves known they are shut down & accused of 'overreacting' or 'taking it the wrong way' (when it has been taken in a very literal way), the perpetrator was just unaware of their crime. By silencing the person they have offended, they're feeding right in to the very oppression they claim to be unaware of.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know that was offensive, I didn't mean to offend."

If you ever get called out for saying something that you didn't know would be harmful, all you have to do is apologise. It's important to remember that when someone is offended, they feel you've already attacked them first: it is not your place now to feel victimised. Defuse the situation by explaining you didn't know, & take this as an opportunity to learn. Why is it offensive? Who does it offend? What can be said instead, or how can you avoid slipping up again in future? At the age of 18, I accidentally offended a drag-queen while out drinking when I said the word "tranny". I had been under the impression it was simply an abbreviation of 'transexual' (while it IS an abbreviation, it's very much like how 'homo' is an abbreviation, but also commonly used as a slur) & had no idea it was a term that brought offense to the community. I said sorry, I felt silly, I went home & I looked it up.

This is what differentiates hateful bigotry from ignorant bigotry.

The only cure for ignorance is knowledge.

As society progresses & changes get brought in to motion, humans learn to adapt to regulation but it can prove difficult to rewrite thoughts or behaviour patterns effortlessly, which is why it's crucial that we take the time to educate ourselves (& each other) on how we can be better people.

"How do I know if I'm saying something non-PC?"

Thinking back to my nana knowing not to use the word 'darkie' in front of a black audience, think of any words you might know that wouldn't sit well with certain crowds. Chances are, you should bin this word from your vocab immediately. Unless you urgently need it to communicate, the English language will surely offer you an alternative so there's no need to hold on to it at all, really. Rejuvenate your vocabulary - give it a good ole spring clean & start the summer with decent patter!

As soon as you know something is offensive, you have the option to better yourself or to offend someone. That choice will always be yours but how people react to it wont always be in your control.